In case you missed it, I removed my Berserk articles from this site because it was bringing in unfavourable traffic. Berserk is my favourite manga of all time, but no story is perfect, and there are glaring issues throughout the first half, particularly with Casca and the way in which her sexual assault is depicted. In my opinion, Miura discomfortingly leans on overused tropes to eroticise Casca’s suffering as opposed to the subtle, more censored sexual assault scenes of Guts and Griffith. I used evidence from the manga to compare these differences, listed the sheer number of times Casca is put through the ringer in this way, and showed how this trope is prevalent in fantasy fiction written by men – geography means nothing here because Berserk, whilst written by a Japanese man, is heavily European coded and follows common storytelling motifs found in Western fantasy. These opinions of mine connected me with many likeminded fans, but the hate was bigger and louder.

How about you piss off? On another note, now that search terms like “Casca” and “Casca Berserk” no longer direct people to this site, most of my traffic comes from *Killing/Stalking* fans, seemingly searching for a summary of the series. Welcome, I guess.

What upset me the most was how people were discovering these two critical reviews out of dozens of favourable ones, spamming my inbox with vitriol to call me a Berserk hater, accusing me of “pushing Western morals on Japan” (as if rape is somehow a good thing over there??), and pretending I’m illiterate. None of these people read my other Berserk analyses, ones that I’d also spent hours writing and researching with painstaking care, so I decided I would no longer allow this site to be an online basement hovel for unbathed, Japan-fetishising misogynists. I removed myself from the fandom completely and vowed to never speak about the series again.

Until now.

I feel terrible about this, I really do. When Koji Mori and Studio Gaga announced the continuation of the series, I was hesitantly hopeful. I didn’t want to outright disparage the idea, and even though I was sceptical about how much Mori had remembered from his conversations with Miura, I admired his determination to honour his best friend. It was quite touching, really, as I’m sure Mori, like so many of us, was devastated that Miura had spent most of his life, over thirty years, on Berserk, only to die suddenly and never see his own story end.

Miura’s death shook me to my core, and I think the reason why I write so obsessively now is because I’m constantly plagued by thoughts of dropping dead before seeing Gethsemane’s end. I’ve had nightmares about passing away on the eve of my debut book’s release just like what happened to poor Jonathan Larson, who died of the same illness as Miura. Life is cruel and unexpected, and Miura encapsulated the trauma and terrors of humanity whilst still showing us the power of resilience, the wonder of found family, and the stubborn, ludicrousness of hope in a world that is determined to hate you. He had a gift that was unique to him, from the depiction of his characters and the detail of his art, right down to his panelling. Every page meant something.

I knew going into this continuation that his style could not be replicated. I didn’t expect a replica or an imitation, but I trusted that his team would find ways to let his story shine though posthumously, so that the long-time fans would have a bittersweet experience. In the beginning, it was bittersweet. I saw the rapidly improving artwork and how the story threads were slowly coming together; I believed an endgame was on the horizon. I still had excitement. Times were sweet. Now they’re just bitter.

The team has decided not to embellish the story in any way or divert from anything other than what Mori knows Miura had already divulged to him. I initially thought such information would have been better translated as a book of notes and sketches instead of fully drawn chapters. For a story to be told properly, surely some editorial additions are needed so Miura’s ideas are properly conveyed? But I considered their desire to maintain the story’s integrity and accepted that their methods were for the best. However, the team’s determination to stay within these parameters means that for the most part, the story doesn’t make sense.

Dialogue between characters is stilted and hard to follow. Scenes transition rapidly. Massive events, like the destruction of Elfhelm, are plagued by emptiness. I read these passages expecting a more active, emotional response from characters like Puck, Isidro, and Farnese, but they remain notably passive, and therefore I struggle to accept the magnitude of the situation. If they don’t care, how can I?

WHO is doing manga like this? Show them to me.

The artwork is good, and some episodes are so clean it feels like Miura’s drawn them, but there’s a strange habit of characters standing around with their eyes closed, totally expressionless. It emphasises the limitations of the story: they act and look like chess pawns, or worse, animated corpses, wandering aimlessly around the pages.

The biggest upset is Guts. I expect him to be morose after losing Casca again – especially because he vowed not to, but we’ve now spent a considerable time watching him shuffle from chapter to chapter as a comatose shell of himself. Berserk is a grimdark story, but a huge part of its appeal is the ridiculous tenacity of its protagonist. Guts dominates every scene he features in. His feats are met with panels of awe and horror from every other character in the vicinity. He defies the odds, and even during his deepest, darkest moments, he’s remained active, combating the plot and the depressing world around him. As Serpico rightly mused: “he’s a man impossible to ignore." So to see this empty creature, literally being dragged around by others, choosing to give up his fight – and by extension, Casca – has been unbearable to witness. Other characters have opined about his behaviour, from Isidro to Silat, begging him to do something. Much of this could have been worked out through one or two chapters, but it’s been several now, over the course of two years.

I’m with Silat! I can’t take this anymore. I’m desperate for another meaningful moment between these two in the next coming chapters because I think it’d be interesting for Silat to bring Guts back to his former self.

I was at a loss, trying to find anyone else who shares my despair, and found myself crawling back to Skullknight.net, tail between my legs. Now, there's an interesting community over there, renowned for its deep analytical dissections of Miura’s work, and they famously wrote a letter to Miura and received a thoughtful response. But they are extremely arrogant and hostile to newcomers. Sometimes they act like they’re Miura’s personal mediums, channelling his thoughts from beyond the veil. But I’ve found myself huddling in the lurking gallery over there, hood over eyes, desperately scrolling their chapter discussions with a satisfied frown on my face, as if I’m in church and listening to a particularly salient point made by the preacher. I’m there tapping my feet and clicking my fingers, ecstatic at the burning vitriol, the rage, the scathing takedowns. They do not hold back at all, and I’m, here for it.

This also highlights another loss. Berserk gave me community. The announcement of a new chapter was once a serious moment on twitter. Everyone did their re-reads, picked over previous discussions, formed new predictions and ideas. When the chapters released, we’d be arguing into the early hours. Now, the announcements are met by a few responses, the chapters release, and I have to scour the timeline for my old friends, most of whom have stopped talking about the series altogether. When people do try to rack up discussion, it’s mainly to meme, or to say how sad they are for Guts, seemingly forgetting they said this during the last chapter release, and the release before that – because that’s all there is to talk about now. Nothing much has happened.

I have never missed a famous person more than Kentaro Miura. His death squeezed the breath out my lungs, and the pain still feels raw to me because of this continuation. When I do read the newest instalment, all I can see is a lack of him. I keep wondering how he would have told this story, how he would have had such and such character respond and act. I’m no longer excited for the ending – I'm scared. Sad to say, Berserk ended on chapter 364 for me. I can’t accept this postmortem. Miura's legacy is in this story, and that final chapter – whenever it’s released – will be his last communication to the world. I truly don’t want it to be. He deserves better.

I'm not enjoying Berserk